I’d like to share a little story that might seem to have nothing to do with brushing and flossing my teeth at night, but stick with me and I think PAPA will radically bless your heart!
In KING YESHUA’S Great Love!
Beautiful Brave Beloved Warrior Princess Melanee Lisa
I no longer have sexualized same-sex attractions — thank You, PAPA!!
Yet…they did not go away by attempting to make-them-go-away — does that make sense?
Actually, I did initially pursue “making them go away,” but fortunately, PAPA had introduced me to Pamela Vest Valentine, a wise, Spirit-filled therapist who let me know that to do so, would just be a Band-Aid. She was a “client-centered” therapist, so she was willing to go that route if that’s what I really wanted, but she also told me that it would not deal with what actually needed to be dealt with — the roots.
The real problems, she said were **not** my homosexual feelings. Rather, she said that my problem was the same problem everyone has:
1. My (mis)perceptions of GOD,
2. My (mis)perceptions of myself, and
3. My (mis)perceptions of GOD and me together.
I immediately asked (it was closer to a demanding growl), “What am I supposed to do with all these other people around me??!!!”
Her eyes were compassionate, while her tone was firmly serious when she replied, “Nothing. You are to do absolutely nothing with other people until you have dealt with the first three areas — enough. And only GOD knows when enough-is-enough.”
She gently continued, “Melanee, you make people your gods…”
(Think, a hard punch to my abdomen, knocking the air out of me — maybe a hard jab to the face, too! And believe me when I say, I wanted to verbally punch her lights out!!)
What PAPA Told me that day through my therapist was this:
If I keep The-Main-Thing-The-Main-Thing…
— My focus being on KING YESHUA and no one else, following Him wherever He leads me; obeying Him (eventually!) in everything He calls me to do; resting IN Him; crying on His Shoulder; letting Him Comfort my hurting, fearful heart; running to Him when others have hurt my feelings; repenting when I disobey Him; accepting His Forgiveness (particularly in visualizing His Cleansing, Healing and Strengthening, Maturing of ALL of me — spirit, soul, body); and much, much more —
…then my ENTIRE life changes!!
A bonus was that my sexualized same-sex attractions dissipated and now…I only have GOD-Given same-sex attractions and opposite-sex attractions like PAPA originally designed each person to have!!!
You might be thinking, “When is she ever going to talk about the hot topic of brushing and flossing?!”
I’m getting there!
The “stuff” I battle today is just as sinful. And any one of them can become destructive strongholds, just like the homosexuality, pornography, and masturbation used to be.
If you’re thinking, “Wow! What could be just as ‘bad’ as sexual sin?” then you’re caught in the same trap that I sometimes get caught in, as well.
Sin — all sin — is destructive, because I’m disconnecting myself from being intimately connected to PAPA.
Okay, I won’t keep you in suspense anymore!
I currently struggle against obeying PAPA in four (out of five) areas He’s Told me to do.
He’s Called me to:
Speak and Write (that’s actually two things together as one), and He’s Told me to Exercise, Eat, Brush my teeth, and Floss my teeth, EVERY day.
Every. Single. Day.
No. Matter. How. Tired. I. Am!!!
And other than eating, most days I fail MISERABLY in the other four categories. Yes, I said most days.
(FYI — eating actually means eating healthy and taking my meds and supplements.)
Well…since I celebrate the Sabbath from Friday evening to Saturday evening, I get a little break, because I only need to eat, brush, and floss during that timeframe!
There ya go! Those are the things that are currently embarrassing me when I’m not obedient. I “tell on myself” to my Sponsor and other accountability folks on whether I’m obeying PAPA or not. And if it starts getting REALLY out of hand, I call my therapist!
In other words, I still have DAILY battles that I can get focused on, ashamed about, worried about, and ask questions like, “Will this EVER change?” or “Will I EVER want to obey DADDY every night about brushing and flossing my teeth???!!!” or “Will I EVER really write what PAPA Wants me to write?” or “Am I EVER going to exercise regularly regardless of the pain?”
You get the picture — and I am not exaggerating!
I really feel those things, think those things, and experience those things.
I can even think SO insanely that I start believing that my value is determined by whether or not I’m obeying PAPA…oh, my…
Another way to phrase that would be a slight variation on what my therapist said back in 1995. Instead of making other people my gods, I’m making my struggles my gods, my obedience my gods, and I can even make my disobedience my gods! Yikes!!!
Something one of my long-distance mentors, Bob Hamp, says goes something like this, “Whenever I make anything other than PAPA my GOD, then I’m plugging into the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, rather than The Tree of Life — KING YESHUA Himself!”
Talk about knowledge becoming a set-up for misery — yikes!!
So, Precious Readers, I share all this to hopefully communicate to you the absolute importance of you “plugging into” PAPA, seeking and pursuing His KINGdom and His Righteousness, rather than change.
I hope you hear me loud-and-clear — I’m *not* accusing you of pursuing change — some of you I’ve never even personally met! I’m just sharing with you how easy it is to get sidetracked off of The Main Thing.
And guess what?! I just fulfilled my writing requirement for the day, too! LOL!!! WOOHOO!!!
Thanks for letting me share!
And REMEMBER: You’re worth it, because PAPA says so!
Here’s a 5-minute video from 13 AUG 2014 — I pray PAPA radically uses this to Glorify Himself and to transform lives! HalleluYAH!!!
Thanks for viewing!!
Howdy, Dear Readers!
The following post was written earlier today.
I’m sitting here on the floor at the 3rd annual Hope For Wholeness (HFW) Conference at Ridgecrest in Black Mountain, NC. One of my Dear Warrior Prince Brothers, Daniel Mingo, is currently sharing and teaching in the general session as I write. I’m **not** being rude by writing while he’s speaking — I’m actually being obedient to PAPA by writing (just letting you know, Bro-Daniel!). 😃
So, here’s my confession…
I’ve NOT been prioritizing being obedient to PAPA’S Command to WRITE — ouch!!!
PAPA, I’m so sorry…I’ve been rejecting You for years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, and seconds regarding Your Calling on my life to WRITE. I ask You to please Forgive me.
“You are Forgiven, Lovee. And I Love you! XO 😃”
Thank You, PAPA!!!
Thank You for Your Great Love! And for Restoring me through Your Life, Suffering, Death, Burial, Resurrection, Life, and Ascension!
Thank You for Your Constant Intercessory Prayer for me and for Your Promise of Returning!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!
“You are Welcome — ALWAYS!!!”
Thank You, PAPA!!!!!!! 😃
Now that Restoration has occurred, I can WRITE!! Yay!!! 😃
HFW’s theme this year is “Masterpiece In Process,” which is why I titled this post, “I’m Whole AND Broken.” I am one of KING YESHUA’S Masterpieces — I’m one of His Originals — made Whole and Complete IN HIM! OORAH!!! 😃
I am also still on this side of The New Heaven and The New Earth, so…I’m also B.R.O.K.E.N. And that’s okay, because He’s The One Who, like The Great Potter that He Is, Reshapes and Remolds me more and more, day-by-day, moment-by-moment.
Back on MON 23 DEC 1985 at around 1000 hours, I was made NEW IN CHRIST — The MESSIAH YESHUA — HalleluYAH!!!
Then in 1988, I went back to my old, sinful way of existing — the only way I knew at that time, which was lesbianism.
He Faithfully Loved me until I repented — thank You, KING YESHUA!!!
He continues to Perfectly Confront my sinful flesh as it is — with NO condemnation — and He Challenges me to Follow Him in Ways that are Perfect for me! It’s HIS Great Love that not only Confronts and Challenges me, but also Comforts, Counsels, and enCOURAGEs me!
Another “C” action word is His Superb Humor Cracks me up! LOL! 😃
He Commands me to stay Kingdom-focused — to have His Eternal Mindset — and to remember that His Salvation and Sanctification of me is both an Event and a Process.
And that’s a GOOD thing!
Thanks for reading, Dear Readers!!
PAPA’S Blessings on you and all of yours! I pray you will ask PAPA to do whatever it takes to soften your heart towards Him, His Word, and His Will in every area of your life — no matter what it costs you! If you do this, He promises to Reshape you until you know for a fact, that you are TRULY one of His Original Masterpieces — even in the midst of your current brokenness!!! 😃
I pray that PAPA Radically Blesses each and everyone of you and your families with an abundance of life transforming Spiritual Truth 2x4s! All in love, of course! 😃😃❤️❤️
And here’s today’s post about that kind of love! Shalom!😊 +++
It was around ’94 or ’95 when I was finally ready to ask my Christian therapist the ‘bigger-than-an-elephant-all-consuming-litmus-test-question’:
“So, Pam, do you believe that homosexuality is a sin?”
She stared intently at me and responded with a question of her own, “Melanee, haven’t you been on ‘both sides of the camp’?”
I knew what she meant, but it was kind of weird hearing it said out loud like that. I nodded ‘yes’ to her question and shrugged my shoulders in an indifferent, ‘so what?’ gesture.
She continued smoothly, “So… what could I possibly say that would be any different than what you’ve already heard from both sides regarding homosexuality?”
I silently shook my head to say ‘nothing.’ That’s when her next question punched me in the stomach, “Melanee, this is between you and GOD. You’re going to have to wrestle this one out with Him and His Word — and no one else.”
Externally I was stunned speechless, but internally I was outraged! Faster than a speeding bullet my thoughts raced, “EVERYONE has an opinion on the topic of sexuality – especially homosexuality!!! Who was she to not tell me her opinion?!!”
I was ready to explode, but she wouldn’t budge.
She refused my repeated offers to share her opinion and finally silenced me with a ‘Spiritual Truth 2×4’ upside my head, “Melanee, neither I nor anyone else can answer this question to your satisfaction. Only GOD can. And it’s only His Opinion that matters, anyway.”
That was the day I learned how life-transforming Spiritual Truth 2x4s could be when wielded with strategic accuracy between the eyes! 😃😃 All because someone loved, honored, and respected me enough to **not** give me their opinion, but instead, pointed me to The One Who Loves me — Perfectly, Unashamedly, and with a Purity beyond my imagination!
Thank You, PAPA, for YOU (and Your Spiritual Truth 2x4s!), and for Pamela Vest Valentine — and — for making her a double doctor!!
Thanks for letting me share!
In KING YESHUA’S Great Love!
Beautiful Brave Beloved Warrior Princess Melanee Lisa